I know it seems i chose to. I just tried to protect you sweety. And i have that stupid quality of protecting people even if it means hurting me. or something i want.

all of the things mentioned here is another reason i wantedt "this". so we could .. Just open up .. no hideing anything with no worries of anyone.my mind is so blank at the moment. I will have to think about what i have to say. I always try to think through what i say. Did you read my diaryx yet?? Maybe this will help us both find out which direction our thoughts are going? ack i cant think of the words i need. I am not forceing anything or trying. Although somewhere i leave it open for possiblity.

Let me get back to you with the rest.

btw .. If you can find any milk crates.. yanno what i am talking about .. they make good things to use around new places. Night stands, shoe boxes, lol stuff like that.

And I think a microwave for xmas would be a lovely gift. You could always give it early.. "surprise" her .. *s
do you have anything else planned for her for xmas?? what other gifts are you thinking of??